Adios Amigo: The Importance of Unfriending

One of my Facebook “friends” started out the new year by announcing that as part of his New Year’s resolutions he was going to be cleansing his Facebook account of all unwanted friends*.  At the end of his post he announced that his unwanted “friends” would know they didn’t make the cut when they no longer saw his (frequent) posts.  At first I thought: “How rude!” Why would he proclaim such a thing for all the world to see?  But as I thought about it more, it occurred to me how important this act really is.

Do any of us really have 647 friends?  Do we really want to know what some of those old high school classmates are doing?  Do we really want to hear about the neighbors’ kids’ little league stats after every game?  Do we really want to know that our old college friend can still fit into her wedding dress 15 years later?  Um…no.

So perhaps as we start a new year, in addition to organizing our closets, and coming up with creative resolutions, we can also try to remember the definition of a true friend:  Someone we really care for, and want the best for – and someone who wants the same for us.  Someone we would rather pick up the phone and talk to, or drive across town for – and not someone whose life we watch from a computer screen miles away.

And perhaps by clearing out the non-friends from our “friends” list, we can remember who – and what – is important in our lives.  What makes us happy and what relieves our stress?  If we are honest with ourselves, reading about far away people from our distant past only makes us out of touch with the people and things we truly care about in the here and now.

*I didn’t make the cut

5 thoughts on “Adios Amigo: The Importance of Unfriending

  1. Kelly says:

    I love this post because it is so true. I actually have a “Facebook friend” with 2,067 friends. I find that I feel a little bit creepy perusing the snapshots of the lives of people I haven’t had a personal conversation with in several years. Not to mention, it is often a huge time-waster. Despite the fact that I find it eternally fascinating that people use Facebook to share such interesting ponderings such as [Amy] “wonders if it is wrong that I am looking forward to Toddlers and Tiaras on TLC tomorrow,” and [Jared] “just went to the corner store and bought his favorite…Twizzlers and Coke Zero,” it might be time to clean house.

    • drstephaniesmith says:

      Kelly
      Thanks for your comment. 2067 friends?!?! Holy cow! And I totally agree about the time-wasting factor of Facebook. Definitely a consideration when determining who to be friends with!

  2. Rebecca says:

    I was “cut” from a high school friend’s Facebook list on Jan. 1. I have to admit, I was one of her “friends” who never responded to her 4-5x a day rants, had hidden her from my wall (because of the frequency) and really only visited her site out of a sick curiosity…what boy next, what drama next, what hairstyle next, what profile picture today? She was right to cut me. 🙂

    • drstephaniesmith says:

      Rebecca
      Thanks for your comment. I didn’t even think about unfriending someone because they didn’t reply to you enough! I guess it’s an important consideration.

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